stress lah fuck. everywhere also work. everywhere also ned press calculator. what else? soo ar, everywhere also chop head lah. cb knn. test all come together one. study sai sia. stupid lecturers dunno how space out, all kuku na bei anyhow schedule almost same week. they got no brains seh. cram all together then say want help us pull up marks. fuck lah. pull my lan lah. study so much together dun burnout heng already lor. go ke siao already must tou siao lor. then reports. reports also flying everywhere. and the stupid exams. like mass gang sia. tests, reports then exams. BOOM! 1 hit KO. alot of ppl sure die one lor.



1 thing i really really hate. animal rights activists. have any of u seen any? because they really suck. if u dun wanna eat meat, thats ur problem. stop telling ppl to stop killing animals for food or for whatever cause. vegetarians just do not eat meat. they do not tell ppl to stop eating meat. heck. monks don't carry boards and protest for animal rights correct? when have u ever seen a monk rioting for animal rights? never right? if they dun wanna eat meat, good. less for them means more for me! if animal activists are so enthusiastic about animals, why don't they just learn animal language and go be the animal's pets, and just fuck off this planet. meat is for consumption. not for saving. go breed cows. millions of them. and dun kill them. see how overrun the planet will be. farms exist for animal meat. not for fun. u dun raise a cow as a pet do u? wat else can a cow do? other than providing meat and milk? nothing right? unless u go collect the methane fart the cow produces lah. then i really got nothing to say. i think the million of cows, if they fart all at the same time, 1 lighter and, BOOM, roasted beef free-for-all.

fucked up exams coming soon. and lots of tests. too many. test on this friday, test on next monday, wednesday and thursday. totally fucked. fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck



after BIA went home. teri had to go her grandma house so she came with me, and made me follow her to take 14. met agus on the way. i bet that i could have gone off 1st, and i was right. 166 and 147 came past. and i was forced to wait for 14. neh neh. then talk until reach expressway, near the army thingy area, i dunno where, alot of army guys came up. nvm. then alot more ppl came on the bus. so teri has to sit in between me and agus. and in front of us, blocked by an ns man, were 2 lesbians. when they got up, teri ask me if chio. actually ar, is more chio than half of sp girls. that i can safely say. that time i still dunno is lesbian mah. so i say yea. not bad lah. then after awhile, teri told me they were lesbians. then ask if i would want. of course! 2 for 1 leh. good bargain!!! LOL. its like my theory. 2 is always better than 1. and 3 is always better than 2. and blah blah blah. then she ask if i want 4 or 5 wives. why not? the more the merrier. its like giving u a choice between a dollar and 5 dollars. like wtf? why take 1 when u got 5? seriously. and i used that for PI lesson too. lecturer was stunned. si buay wtf. kelvin, u got owned. LOL



havent been posting lately. being lazy. even pictures of the 2 birthday cards arent up. why? simple. cos im a lazy guy. dont expect alot from me anytime soon. simply cos im just too lazy. and i've been tired lately. very tired. slept through the last part of a maul game with js. went to rest with towers slamming the dumb creeps. woke up with the victory sign. was damn wtf



if any of u can ask what is wrong, and get no answers from me, and u still can ask again and again, then i can safely say that u are an idiot. why? simple. cos i speak when i feel like it, and i keep quiet when i feel like it. and if i wanna keep quiet about something, do any of u seriusly think u can get it out of me? sounds fucked up right? but thats the way i work. dun like it? none of my freaking business



woke up almost late today. went to GEMs lesson thinking got skit to do. then postpone to next week. i hate skits. i fucking hate skits. u have to act in front of so many ppl. it simply sucks. its ok to act in front of other ppl. BUT. as urself. not as someone ur not. now, next tuesday i need to act "zi high". something im totally not. and i need talk alot. also something im most probably not familiar with strangers. zzz. and my chivas is gone. zzz. not gonna open any of my remaining bottles. means no alcohol in my system soon, which also means, __________. zi you fa hui the blank urself. i dun need to reveal anything. ppl who know me should know what it will be.



lots of nonsence occur the past few months. the most nonsensical is kelvin spreading my blog around. now, most of my class most probably knows this place.i can't fuck over anyone here now. zzz. thanks ar kelvin. now the only person i can cbcb the most is u nia. well done on saboing urself. and i think im not gonna be myself for quite some time. too tired



when u are anti-social, there would be no one to miss from ur past. gone MIA means out of my head, forgotten le. and my memory is so "powerful", i even remember to forget their names too. and now, certain names are being tried by me to be forgotten. will work? will not work? will it be worth the forgetting? i dunno.

but there are people that are hard to forget. especially those si buay tolerant one. can kachiao until die that kind. wun name anyone, but have to name 2. the 2 most kachiao-able ppl i have ever seen. 1 is my best friend, mj. the short and bulliable black belt 3rd dan (?) karate pro. always kena bullied one. dunno why too. he's just like a living punching bag. lol. eh no offense ar. and the second is kelvin. another short one too. always emoing and doing crap. eh wait. not crap cos he himself is crap. so dunno wat he doing. yea. u meet those 2, become their friend, wa seh. endless amount of entertainment. but dunno why. with sec sch friends more relax leh. poly friends like aiyo cannot make up mind one. want go here 1 minute, next minute go there. headache seh.



lets see. i'm sick. sore throat + stupid runny nose. and i dun feel like studying at all. wanted to skip 1 class today. then the stupid lecturer come. failed my spot quiz as expected. i pull out common factor in 2 formula wrong meh? must say i use wrong technique meh? wtf. i simply simplified the bloody god damn freaking thing only lah. walao.

and, whiskey for sore throat works. it numbs the pain i think. i felt nothing. too bad im out of honey. or the stupid throat would be better now. zzz. i hate being sick







ok. another pic post. rare occasion. some of this are just preparation. like the one below.

okok preparation photos. by the girls? think so


my cake. obviously


lol dunno wats this


and this too


and this too


and this too


and this too


and this too


ok im finally there. found the cake


they were trying to light the candles. with wind blowing. lol


lighting


still lighting


no more fire. blow out liao


im supposed to cut cake


yes im cutting


and cutting


and cutting


and cutting


cut finish


eating time?


dunno why bird standing. got so many chair and he still stand


eating my "lunch"


birdy helping me


still eating


eating again


dunno why mafia photo here. but since its here, this person is mafia. watch out for her. she's dangerous. lol


in BIA lecture? or after? dunno. nice middle finger by me again


i was forced to do this!


they were passing it to me


my dinner. very nice.


shared dessert. they didn't let me pay anything except my GST free meal


dessert eating time


kai yuan,


su ern,


yi fan,


su yee,


and hui lu. the 5 ppl that came out


finished dessert. the 6 spoons there for fun. i was bored


again. kai yuan holding it up for me


why my face like that? cos SOMEONE ask me to smile. so i "smiled"


at vivo. can see my chivas level havent go down


ms perfectionist wanted a nicer looking pic. and this happened


1 line. after a long time


me and su ern


me and su yee

the rest never take any pics with me. so no more pics. gifts pics will have to wait. im lazy to upload them. and those who wanna drink, according to my friends, chivas is strong. dun try unless u very siao. like me. mr bear took a mouth after BIA and got drunk? according to i forgot who liao. and its good for clearing blocked noses. just drink and immediately lie down. immediate nose blockage cleared! tried that in vivo. nose pain. cos i dun have blocked nose. and kelvin is being an asshole by using that picture. zzz.



yesterday was my birthday. went to sch, got gift liao. stupid a kon. give spot quiz. cb. then the girls passed me my present. we'll keep pics of those later ar? now in school slacking. uploading pics are stressful. then after dunno how mnay break. i think before BIA. i went to print notes. then this bird. he go bring me to fc 1. then i see cake. CAKE. zzz. then the girls (again) were there. jamie, yin ling, casandra, ding rui, chithrra and kris. and the bird. then i got to eat cake for lunch. lol. they didn't smash the cake in my face. so i guess im lucky. yay. lol.

then after BIA, went cine find su ern, su yee, kai yuan and hui lu. with yi fan. ky confirm late one. that one no need say de. lol. but hui lu was later. we ordered before she came. too hungry. pics later too. after eat, go vivo. suposed to drink, those 4 never drink. only kai yuan pei me drink. zzz. later got more thingys. i going lesson liao.



just got back from work. its 12.58am. and its sian. went work. 1st dish was screwed up by me. i crashed a whole plate of lobster salad. oops. so for the 1st course, many ppl did not have lobster to eat. all the chefs never say anything. just faster help me grab food from other ppl and make a complete dish. then 1 stupid junior chef and a captain diao me. and scold so loud. my friend tell me ignore. so yea. i ignored. wat nonsence. everyone makes mistakes lah pls. wtf. anyway, 2nd dish. bao chi or watever. whole pieces of shark's fin. cb lah. 1 bowl 200 bucks. and there's like 80++ tables. cb hotel rich like fuck liao. the rest of the dinner no need say lah. all the expensive and good stuff. like whole abalones, a freaking huge garoupa, prawns and watever lah ar? all the nonsence wines provided although no hard liquor for me kope. and 1 thing. punggol got alot of rich chio bu. my table 10 ppl, 5 chio bu already. the rest all lao ah pek and 1 old lady. so, half half. punggol got half chio, half lao kok kok. didn't have time to eat dinner. eating now. spaghetti and some sauce. my dinner. now. 1.05 am. wow

oh and i saw mark lee, jack neo and henry thia. they were selling the 10th aniversary VCD of money no enough at the banquet. some auction thingy. raise funds for i dunno wat. then the VCD was sold not to a singaporean, but to a jap guy. that guy rich. 8K he also can throw into drain. just for a VCD. zzz. if i got that kind of money to waste. cb. i sure wun waste that way. anyway, after auctioning it off, they did wat they promised. to sing together. and they sang the theme song for money no enough. damn funny. after so many years not hearing, it sounds really damn funny. and they didn't get the target for the VCD. they actually wanted 20 to 30K for the VCD. but, they lowered the standards for charity. lol. somthing which i would not do. never. ever.



im sure everyone looks forward to their birthday right? not me. i never looked forward to my birthday ever. why? that i also dunno. but i just do not look forward to it.



zzz. im bored, im bored and im bored. why am i bored? tons of games out there to play. and im not playing them. and jap class is always a laugh. mj, me, danial and lijuan always kena one. 100%. every lesson. we sit front row, back row, middle row, all also kena. not fair. why shoot us 4 always one. noticed i havent been contributing to alot of reports and/or projects. some is cos i too lazy, some is cos nothing left for me to do, and some is left for me to do and i dunno how to do in the end ask other ppl for help. so, i dunno. think im going to die badly for some modules. need to start studying soon for exams. sounds very unlike me. but im mad. so yes. STUDY. means, erm, less gaming, more music and more paper. and i need cash. anyone wants to sponsor me for a year? nothing in return of course.



lyrics
I'm walking in the rain
行くあてもなく　傷ついた身体濡らし
絡みつく凍りのざわめき
殺しつづけて　彷徨う　いつまでも
Until I can forget your love

眠りは麻藥
途方にくた　心を靜かに溶かす
舞い上かる　愛を踊らせて
ふるえる身体を記憶の薔薇いつつむ
I keep my love for you to myself

Endless rain, fall in my heart 心の傷い
Let me forget all of the hate, all of the sadness

Days of joy, days of sadness slowly pass me by
As I try to hold you, you are vanishing before me
You're just an illusion
When I'm awaken, my tears have dried
in the sand of sleep
I'm a rose blomming in the desert

It's a dream, I'm in love with you
まどろみ抱きしぬて

Endless rain, fall in my heart 心の傷い
Let me forget all of the hate, all of the sadness

I awake from my dream
I can't find my way without you

The dream is over
聲にならない　言葉を繰り返しても
高すぎる　灰色の壁は
過ぎ去った日の思いを夢に寫す
Untill I can forget your love

Endless rain, fall on my heart 心の傷い
Let me forget all of the hate, all of the sadness

translation
I'm walking in the rain
Nowhere to go, soaking my broken body
Killing the noise of the ice binding me
Forever, wandering
Until I can forget your love

Sleep is a drug
Calming a worried heart
Dancing the rising love
Shrouding the shaking body in a rose of memories
I keep my love for you to myself

Endless rain, fall on my heart
On the wounds on my heart
Let me forget all of the hate, all of the sadness

Days of joy, days of sadness slowly pass me by
As I try to hold you, you are vanishing before me
You're just an illusion
When I'm awake, my tears have dried in the sand of sleep
I'm a rose blooming in the desert

It's a dream, I'm in love with you
Embracing the drowsiness

Endless rain, fall on my heart
On the wounds on my heart
Let me forget all of the hate, all of the sadness

I awake from my dream
I can't find my way without you

The dream is over
Repeating the words that won't come out
Seeing the day the grey wall disappeared
In my dreams
Until I can forget your love

Endless rain, fall on my heart
On the wounds on my heart
Let me forget all of the hate, all of the sadness

Endless rain, let me stay
Evermore in your heart
Let my heart take in your tears, take in your memories

Endless rain, fall on my heart
On the wounds on my heart
Let me forget all of the hate, all of the sadness

Endless rain...

makes sense? yes. alot of sense. very old band, very nice song. long disbanded but still, nice and meaningful. whatever

ok this is another one of those i dunno why i kena things to do lists. as if i do le u ppl will understand me better. should be another one of those nothing to do lists bah

1. The person who last tag you is: ming jun. the shorty and fatty
2. Your relationship with him/her is: one of my best friends?
3. Your five impression of him/her: lazy, super indecisive, gamer, never waste money and a bloody damn good friend
4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you: letting him be my punching bag for so many years
5. The most memorable thing he/she had said to you: nothing
6.If he/she become your lover, you will: YUCKS. I'M NOT GAY
7. If he/she become your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be: SHUDDUP ALREADY
8. If he/she become your enemy, you will: that will never happen
9. If he/she become your enemy, the reason will be: like i said, won't happen
10. The most desire thing you want to do for him/her now is: not disturb him. lazy ppl like us need lots and lots of rest.
11. Your overall impression of him/her is: another fellow slacker
12. How you think people around you will feel about you?: i dunno. and i dun care. thats their problem
13. The characters you love of yourself are: neutrality and sarcasm
14. On the contrary, the characters you hate yourself are: nothing
15. The most ideal person you want to be is: myself
16. For people that care and like you, say something to them: yo. have some laughs here and get lost and go rest. SLACKERS FOR LIFE!!!
17. Pass this quiz to 10 persons that you wished to know how they feel about you
actually, i dunno who to pass to. maybe got less than 10. i dunno.
1. ming jun
2. mr paddington bear
3. evil twin
4. birdy?
5. noobshit
lol i no more ppl can add le. stops at 5. yay.
18. Who is no.6 having relationship with? lol. no no. 6
19. Is no.9 a male or female? wouldn't know. no no. 9 too
20. If no.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing? LOL. both numbers also no one.
22. What is no.2 studying about? same as me
23. When was the last time you had a chat with no.3? just only in school?
24. What kind of music band does no.8 like? hehe. no no. 8 too!
25. Does no.1 have any siblings? yea
26. Will you woo no.3? nope. she already taken liao
27. How about no.5? ANOTHER YUCKS. I ALREADY SAID I'M NOT GAY.
28. Is no.4 single? yup
29. What is the surname of no.5? yeo
30. What 's the hobby of no.4? sleeping in class?
31. Does no.5 and 9 get along well? no. 5 will never know no. 9. cos there's no no. 9. lol
32. Where is no.2 studying at? same as me lah
33. Talk something casually about no.1: lazy armrest
34. Have you tried developing feelings for no.8? no no. 8. how to have feeling?
35. Where does no.9 live at? in my imagination
36. What colour does no.4 like? pink? LOL i dunno
37. Are no.5 and 1 best friends? nope. friends only
38. Does no.7 like no.2? hah.no no. 7
39. How do you get to know no.2? was supposed to collect funds for some charity. didn't collect. went gaming instead. then not enough money to clear CIP hrs. so, mr bear kindly donated alot to my tin. lol. and we became friends!
40. Does no.1 have any pets? nope. unless u count his sister as 1
41. Is no.7 the sexiest person in the world? wouldn't know. no no. 7. lol

and yes. i have been proven right. its another one of those lists not to do if there's not enough ppl to sabo



tired, tired, tired and still tired. sleep early tired. sleep late more tired. all the same still end up i tired. not fair. went cca today. finally. after poning so many. cca still sucks. wish i didn't have one. almost 4 hrs of nothing to do-ness. went there today, anyhow shoot. didn't care. care for wat? its just a dumb cca. went grandma house after that for dinner. tapaoed dinner. then went home ask the noob kelvin do report, he cb seeing show. zzz. nothing do from 9 to 9.30. so i went see show also. the nightmare before christmas. very nice. recommending to everyone. got a whole bunch of movies i wanna watch. no time, no money. anyone interested in sponsoring me?

full scale cold war happening. if erupt into real war. wow. miracle would be happening, plus a show would be there. nice or not, that one cannot be decided. YET. so yea. no war best. then everything quiet. very good. otherwise noisy lah.



got all my results back already. expected failures are expected failures. scores are below. considered good since i studied the night before and just before the exam?

Fluid Mechanics A: 18/50
Heat Transfer and Equipment: 35/100
Process Instrumentation: forget already. but pass
Plant Utilities: 68/80
Engineering Maths II: 88/100
BIA: dunno. its either havent got back or i forgot



why can't i sleep at night? msn keeps dcing. so i stopped going online. and i still can't sleep.

reason actually is damn simple. i'm having the same illusions and delusions from last sem. double. it never seems to end. maybe its time to keep quiet and to myself




i have really not slept well these few days. the week of MST and the week straight after it. why? costly cos studying sucks up sleeping time, i go exam there do finish try sleep or faster run out rest. then there was this 3 night period of pure gaming until 4am ++. think i broke all of my records in those 3 days. and then there are some gaming here and there, alot of stressful reporting, and there's still schooling going on. sucks, sucks and sucks. i am really freaking tired. tomorrow is the screwed up class again. FMA. stupid idiotic and totally stressful topic. lecturer lives in a condo right next to my primary school. and my primary school is 1 block of flats away from my block. so u can imagine how near to the screwed up lecturer im living. that sucks too.

if i had a chance to change schooling, i would change the exams to all open book. that way, failure rate would be lessened. anyway, in real life, we CAN flip to notes. its not as if u cant use any notes. there's like a fucking lot of formula and equations to be used. can anyone remember all? most probably those seniors who have worked 20, 30 years? those that can afford to remember the equations and formula for laziness sake. not us. we might even not be doing this shit after all. we may be going other areas to work where equations means nothing. wtf lah. its all a waste of time and brain power.



now let me ask u ppl a question. normally when u do practicals, do you clean up after completion? or do u just let a few of ur group members to do the cleaning? will not say anything. everyone is tired after the stupid pract. so who's gonna do the clearing? and who's gonna vanish into thin air? currently chewing a tube of haribo sour to cool down.

maybe its time to store my anger. store and store and store. then when really buay tahan that kind explode. the facial expressions of the ppl who see it. i wonder how they would be. would be kinda worth it though. ok its decided. i shall try that out.

Terence
Radin Mas Primary, Queensway Secondary and now Singapore Poly
Singaporean (obviously duh)
freshly made on 14th July 1990
godofsuckers@hotmail.com

the views made by me here, are seriously 100% not meant for any morons to see

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